i thought you should know

I’m your lover when I’m not
Busy hating you for making me feel
Small like the fly you flicked the other
Day because it landed near your plate

I’m a man when I’m not being
Castrated by your bored look as
You turn on the light to go wash me
Off of you like you did after you petted
That stray dog the other day

I’m forgiving when I’m not being vengeful
Thinking about the best way to hurt you
Like I did the other day when I told
You how your clothes don’t fit any more
And wearing black doesn’t make you look thin

I’m happy when I’m not being sad
Watching you walk out the house like
You did the other day to go be a whore
As if I didn’t know his name is Richard
It says so on the card you dropped on the floor

I’m kind when I’m not being cruel
Like when I fingered your sister in the
Bathroom the other day while you were
Downstairs talking to her boyfriend and
Cooking dinner for the four of us to enjoy


tired of lunacy

tired of lunacy
i lay my head down
to love you



Creation…the greatest gift of life is expressed through our choices.  Through our choices we create our realities.  Shatter the illusion.  If our reality dissatisfies us, we are free to destroy it and begin again.  It is time to stop the ignorance. – Big Mountain


how sweet she might smell

She is the perfect shade of pale
blonde and very white. Her dark
lined eyes stand out against her skin,
creating mystery in contrast to perfect
teeth, thin pink lips.

Her cleavage is as expansive
as snow covered fields and invite
my eyes to wander and my mind
to wonder about the joy between
two spaces, my heart paces.

She flicks her hair like pixie dust
casting spells on those near enough
to comprehend her beauty is only
skin deep but that is enough for me
as shallow as I am I would only drown
if there is more to her than I can see.

I care not what lies beneath her skin
the depth of her intellect would only
mean conversations I could do without.
Her voice is trapped behind glass while
I sit and stare from the shadows and smoke
pretending to be interested in A Theory of
Everything.  What do philosophers know
of love and lust beyond wisdom’s front?

I would rather have toast and tea and
contemplate how sweet she might smell
compared to a rose.

general stuff

barefoot boogie

I went to my first barefoot boogie led by the magnificent Mandy Kasafir. Transcendental dance is a good way to describe it. Imagine a room full of people who share an interest in peace, harmony, respect and love for all life. Imagine this group of like-minded people moving their bodies in whichever way feels right to them in time and not in time with soul stirring, foot tapping music in a dimly lit room…that is a barefoot boogie

general stuff reflection

follow your bliss

Joseph Campbell wrote: “If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living.  When you see that, you begin to meet people who are in the field of your bliss, and they open the doors to you.  I say follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be.”


odd day

I feel odd, but not odd.  Or rather I don’t want to feel odd because I have no reason to feel odd.  How odd is that?  I haven’t done anything physical today.  Perhaps that’s why I feel odd.  I finished reading The Dharma Bums for the second time.  And for the second time, I enjoyed the read.


the west point way of leadership

I read the West Point Way of Leadership by Colonel Larry Donnithorne.  There were only a few useful nuggets in the book.  Most of it was a pep rally advocacy for West Point.  I am a West Pointer, so on the one hand the pep rally stuff is OK for an insider, but for useful leadership material to an outsider, it’s pretty weak.  I can’t believe the publishers tried to equate the book with the same level of importance as Sun Tzu.

I did like the prayer the other mentioned that one of classmates carries around in his wallet:

Care more than others think is wise
Risk more than others think is safe
Dream more than others think is practical
Expect more than others think is possible

All this reading on leadership has made me re-realise the importance of leadership in every day life or even leadership as a lifestyle and that even in my role as father I am a leader and need to act accordingly. I am the pack leader.


question no. 23

There’s a symposium tomorrow at the local Catholic college and the question on the table is: “Are morals a thing of the past?”

I can guess what the Catholic school is going to say, what’s your view?

On the Road reflection

return to the temple

I like to climb a mountain at the start of the year.  Yesterday, my friend Will and I climbed Mount Snowdon in North Wales. It is a mountain that I am intimately familiar with.
Snowdon is my temple and I go there to contemplate life, love, and the universe.  It was a perfect day to climb a mountain.  The weather was dry.  The sun was out.  The wind was cold and the mountain was covered with a light flooring of snow.

We talked about a great many things and the mountain, as high priest, listened with great patience to our confessions, our fears, our worries, and our dreams.  When we reached the top, the mountain baptized us with fierce wind and snow.  I felt my sins absolved.  And then the mountain sent us on our way with its blessings.

I am now ready to embrace the continuing adventure of life in 2008.



think different

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.â€? – Apple Computers


a samurai and a zen master

A samurai, a very proud warrior, came to see a Zen Master one day. The samurai was
very famous, but looking at the beauty of the Master and the Grace of the moment, he
suddenly felt inferior.

He said to the Master, “Why am I feeling inferior? Just a moment ago everything was
okay. As I entered your court suddenly I felt inferior. I have never felt like that before. I have faced death many times, and I have never felt any fear — why am I now feeling

The Master said, “Wait. When everyone else has gone, I will answer. ”

People continued the whole day to come and see the Master, and the samurai was getting
more and more tired waiting. By evening the room was empty, and the samurai said,

“Now, can you answer me?”

The Master said, “Come outside.”

It was a full moon night, the moon was just rising on the horizen. And he said, “Look at
these trees. This tree is high in the sky and this small one beside it. They both have
existed beside my window for years, and there has never been any problem. The smaller
tree has never said to the big tree, ‘Why do I feel inferior before you?’ This tree is small,
and that tree is big — why have I never heard a whisper of it?”
The samurai said, “Because they can’t compare.”
The Master replied, “Then you need not ask me. You know the answer.”

general stuff