Categories
Blog

old bangers

Wham, bam, thank you ma’am, 5 minutes and £25 is all it took to pass inspection. MOT inspection, that is. My banger is now road worthy. I must add, it’s just barely road worthy considering I used cheap labour and cheap parts to get it through inspection.

Not to worry, it’s now our spare vehicle. I recently bought a used Ford Galaxy with only 53,000 miles on the clock. The tax runs out on the Astra today, so I’ll park it on the drive and keep it around as the emergency vehicle when one or the other of our vehicles is being fixed or serviced. I only deal in used cars anyway, at least 10 years old. They don’t cost me much and generally I’ll run them until they fall apart and aren’t worth fixing.

I’ve only ever owned one new car in my life and the whole time I hated it. I hated paying that monthly car note. I sold it after a few months and went back to my trusty old bangers. I’m not one of these guys who equates their car with their penis or who is bothered about status. Old bangers, to me, have personality. And as Samuel L. Jackson said in Pulp Fiction: “personality goes a long way.”

Categories
Inspiration

some thoughts to consider

Here are some thoughts to consider when you sit down to reflect on 2010 and start making your plans/goals/resolutions for 2011:

“While others were hiding last year, new products were launched, new subscriptions were sold and new companies came into being. While they were laying low, websites got new traffic, organizations grew, and contracts were signed. While they were stuck, money was being lent, star employees were hired and trust was built. Most of all, art got created.” – Seth Godin (you can read the full text here)

If there’s some stuff you wanted to do in 2010, but didn’t do it for whatever reason, remember someone out there did do it and they probably faced similar challenges to yourself, but they soldiered on anyway. I know I’m guilty of letting bullshit reasons get in my way. It’s easy to do because the reasons always sound so convincing. But what it really comes down to is this:

How bad do you really want it?

Categories
tumblr posts

“This writing is like cocaine and I’m damned if I can figure out why people keep at it.”

“This writing is like cocaine and I’m damned if I can figure out why people keep at it.”

Hunter S. Thompson

Categories
tumblr posts

Taken with instagram

Taken with instagram

Categories
tumblr posts

Merry Christmas everyone. Hopefully you’ve been more naughty than nice! :-)

Merry Christmas everyone. Hopefully you’ve been more naughty than nice! 🙂

Categories
Blog

stand by your man

I wonder what was going through Tommy Sheridan’s mind as he stood clutching his wife outside the courthouse, where he had been found guilty of perjury, while she gave a canned speech about standing by her man.

A man who had been outed by the News of the World as being a swinger and a serial adulterer. Why that was news to anyone is beyond me. Politicians have been doing this kind of thing since forever. It seems to come with the territory. Power and sex go together like salt and pepper, peanut butter and jam, ham and cheese, well, you get the point.

What I don’t get is why he thought he could get away with it in the first place. I guess power has a way of making people think they are invincible. I mean if you go to a public place like the swingers’ club Cupid’s in Manchester with an entourage of people, one of whom is a journalist, how could you not expect to be outed? I guess Tommy thought the old Shaggy line, “It wasn’t me,” would be enough to give him plausible deniability.

I wonder what was going through Tommy’s mind when he called up his pals Andy McFarlane, Gary Clark, Katrine Trolle, and Anvar Khan. I count three men and two women. I wonder if he invited Gail along or was she stuck at home looking after their daughter?

I don’t condemn Tommy for doing the swinging thing. Hey, to each his own. What bothers me is he didn’t want to man up to his actions and tell the public and his constituents that yeah, he likes to swing every now and then. So what. You know how it is when you’re a married man in your mid 40’s and feeling a bit bored, sometimes a little swinging can put the swing back in your relationship.

It’s funny that Gail describe Tommy as “boring” and that he would rather play Scrabble than have sex. I guess Scrabble was his front. Or maybe he was doing what he thought she wanted him to do – you know, be a domesticated family man playing Scrabble as a gesture of spending quality time together, when actually all he probably wanted to do was jump her bones. And she probably wanted him to jump her bones, but he missed the signals, like men are prone to do. We find it hard to read women.

Maybe it’s the communications barrier. We all know we want sex. So why all the drama? Why not just get busy, like we did when we were horny teenagers groping each other in the park after dark or in the cemetery where we knew no-one would find us. I guess romance replaces horniness. Women want romance or at least that’s my perception. Men, we want to knock the boots with no fanfare. But then we’re made to feel guilty thinking of women as sex objects, a receptacle for our lust. So instead, we opt out of sex with our partners altogether and turn to extra-marital shenanigans. As Yasmin Alibhai-Brown alluded to, some times gentlemen prefer whores because its easier, like going to the grocery store and buying any other product.

It’s a shame Tommy boy didn’t just own up to his sexual shenanigans. Now if things don’t turn out in his favour in January, he’ll have to hope his girl will pay him a conjugal visit. Although, judging from her past actions, she’s more likely to send him another postcard from Barbados saying ‘Hope you and Bowling Bag Bob are having a good time in cellblock four.’

Categories
tumblr posts

“The honey is worth the sting.”

“The honey is worth the sting.”

Rumi

Categories
Blog

Woldstock – Christmas Night Out

woldstock
click on photo to listen to some pretty funny stuff.

Categories
tumblr posts

“The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page.”

“The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page.”

Saint Augustine

Categories
Music

My Top 10 Tunes this Week


Get Your Own Free Hypster.com Playlist.

Categories
Blog

dirty little secrets

I’m going to reveal to you, dear reader, a secret that I have never ever told another soul. It’s a secret shared exclusively to the readers of my blog (and by default, my twitter, tumblr, and facebook readers). But first…

The whores and the gossip mongers are turning tricks again to get the inside scoop. Amazon, afraid that some of the dirt might rub off on them, have ditched Wikileaks from its servers. There will be consequences for such cowardice. Nobody likes a rat that jumps ship at the first sign of trouble.

Is Julian Assange really a modern day Robin Hood stealing from the information-rich to hand back to the poor? I don’t think so. I think he’s just another dude with an axe to grind who has found fame by becoming the U.S. Government’s cyber-enemy number of one.

People love dirty little secrets. Assange has found fame by trading in the dirty little secrets of governments and big corporations. He doesn’t steal the information. Disgruntled employees leak the information to him and he has the balls to publish it on the Internet for all to read. So I don’t see what the problem with Assange is. OK, the U.S. Government is claiming he’s putting lives at risks. But is he really? If he were hacking into secure systems and stealing the information, then yes, I’d say he was an outlaw akin to Robin Hood. But since he gets his information from malcontents, then hey, don’t shoot the messenger, find the dirty rat bastards putting the stuff in his lap and shoot them. They are the ones putting lives in danger, if indeed any lives are in danger. The U.S. Government has been known to exaggerate from time to time. Remember all the lives at stake from Iraq’s huge stockpile of WMD?!

The U.S. Government’s latest beef with Assange is the release of more than 251,000 American diplomatic cables, mostly unclassified but including many labeled “classified” or “secret”. Here’s an example:

Karl Eikenberry, the current US ambassador to Afghanistan, in a 2009 cable describes Karzai as “insecure” and a “paranoid and weak individual”.

“Indeed his inability to grasp the most rudimentary principles of state-building and his deep seated insecurity as a leader combine to make any admission of fault unlikely, in turn confounding our best efforts to find in Karzai a responsible partner,” Eikenberry said.

Eikenberry added that Karzai continually blames the US and its allies for Afghanistan’s problems rather than looking at the problems of his leadership, and that his attitude was unlikely to change.

For me the real culprits are the snivelling puppies who leak this stuff. Assange is just the delivery boy along with all the other misfits, drunkards, and failures who are mired in the low trade of journalism (or in the even lower trade of blogging, like me.)

OK, so here’s my dirty little secret that no-one else knows. I once, out of fear, squeezed a parakeet to death. I was 7 years old at the time.

Categories
tumblr posts

“How do you achieve anything without goals? The short answer is: the same way as you always did — get…”

“How do you achieve anything without goals? The short answer is: the same way as you always did — get excited about something and do it!”

Categories
dispatches

born again

Born again.

I was tired of this life and decided to create another, in Second Life of course. Like a scene out of the Terminator, I materialise into an all white room.  I am naked.  A woman materialises next to me.  She is naked.  We are Adam and Eve.  Or in this case Clay187 and Whitelake.  I ask her if this is Heaven.  She is to concerned with her naked body to reply.  I have been reborn a biker rock-star dude with spiky hair. My dress code is all black leather.

The gods of Second Life have left a set of instructions on big billboards.  Six steps to a new life.  First learn how to walk.  Next learn how to zoom in.  And you have to learn how to sit in case you get tired of walking around this vast virtual world.  It’s a new world, how do you find your way around? With a map of course and in this new world I can teleport from town to town, island to island, country to country.  And when exploring a place, why walk when you can fly.  The Second Life gods are cool.  Man can fly.

Six steps complete.  I fly off into a brave new world.

I meet my first friend in this new life, TheFallenPrince from Middlesex.  If any of you dear readers are roaming around the world of Second Life, look me up.  I am Clay187.