soulcruzer

Okay so I haven’t done well on the dicing…I make so many decisions a day that hald the time I coundn’t be bothered to role the dice and the other half, I couldn’t stomach the idea of leaving the choice to chance instead of deliberation. I have to let go and embrace the randomness. But I suppose if you really think about, all of our choices are half chance any way. The forces of chance are constantly at work in our lives. But some how to nakedly introduce chance seems hard. I guess because it shatters the illusion of control.

I’ve started recruiting for a new adventure race team. I’m hoping to put the team together in the next couple of weeks so we can start training together and hopefully race some time mid April. My run tonight was short but swift. I could feel the cold air slicing its way through my lungs.

I’m so tired right now….I’m half asleep at the keyboard…writing these sentences is draining the last little bit of energy I have left…it won’t be long now till I have to surrender to slumber.

It’s the 9th day of Feb and I’m now just starting my journal for 2004, which is a break from tradition for me as I usually begin in January with the grand idea that this will be the year I finally take writing seriously and get published and yada yada yada. Anyway I was in no mood to follow that same storyline again in 2004. In fact, I have not set my mind to anything other than taking the days as they come and seeing what fortune brings.

But having drifted for a month, I feel I need to now set some goals to accomplish for 2004, mainly to give me something to focus so I don’t drift into oblivion.

I’ve started training hard again. In the next couple of days, I need to pick an event to train for…something that validates my efforts.

Work has been exciting, fun and busy for the last couple of months…but somewhere in the mind, I keep thinking that my career, such as it is, is not on any real progressive track…no yellow brick road to the top. Does it need to be? The last thing I want to happen is for the next 5 years to go flying by and I’m still at the same pay grade and position. The last 3 years I’ve made several lateral moves…but really am in the same place just with a slightly different angle.

The answer is obvious on one level….I need to break that cycle and move on and up…but because things are in place at work, I can do frivolous things outside of work like hiking and climbing, and generally puttering around on the computer doing this and that.

It’s time to get the Eye of the Tiger back…

So over the next 4 days I plan to get the chicken bones out and set a course for the next leg of my journey…

I’m in a lull before transition…transition between phases…it’s like the quiet before the storm type of thing were I feel calm and confused and unfocused. Best cure for it is just to read and ride it out. I started rereading the Balkan Ghost by Robert Kaplan. He is one of favorite literary travel writers.

I’ve got some holiday coming up over the next couple of days…I plan to spend much of it in communion with nature and sorting out my goals for 2004. I need to sort out my big event for 2004…

I stumbled across a 60 second interview with Luke Rhinehart in Friday’s edition of the Metro. I had never heard of the dice theory before even though Luke’s original book appeared 30 years ago. At any rate, I did some surfing around to find more enough on ‘dicing’. It sounds like an interesting concept…I might give it a go for a couple of weeks and see what results come of living by the dice. I’m not sure to what extent i’m going to dice…certain decisions or all…hmm okay why don’t I let the dice decide…

1 – no dice 2 – dice completely 3 – dice for minor decisions 4 – dice completely for 1 week 5 – dice minor for 1 week 6 – roll again

and the verdict is….6 roll again

rollling….6

rolling….6

maybe this is trick die

rolling….4

If yoou want to read more about dice living checkout Luke Rhinehart’s site at http://www.lukerhinehart.net/ or for a summation of dice living check out dice living at http://www.dicelife.com/node/view/1

Apparently, the only hard and fast rule of dice living is “the dice must always be obeyed.” I’ll keep you posted…

Okay, I’m happy now. I’ve found my way around enough to be comfortable. I currently maintain a blogg on http://www.soulcruz.com but as I like the look and feel of livejournal, I think I will start migrating my thoughts over here. I especially like the fact that I can update from the road considering I do travel a lot. Besides that i have another use for my soulcruz domain…details to follow.

Just giving one of the clients a go.

Found livejournal through another user…I like blogging so I thought i’d give it a go.