The deeper self—how often we imagine it as some distant, serene oasis within, a place we’ll reach if we just travel deeply enough, peel back enough layers, scale enough inner mountains. But if we pause and really listen, we might sense something more dynamic at play. The self isn’t a final destination at the end of a winding journey. No, it’s a relationship, alive and shifting with every moment. It’s less a still point of perfect harmony and more a constant, rhythmic dance—one that evolves as we move through life, accumulating experiences, forging connections, and embracing the spaces we inhabit.

“An individual’s harmony with his or her ‘own deep self’ requires not merely a journey to the interior but a harmonising with the environmental world.” – James Hillman,

James Hillman’s insight nudges us away from seeking a single, unchanging “truth” of self, and invites us instead to see ourselves as participants in an ongoing, responsive dialogue with everything around us. Our deeper self is not a solitary treasure waiting to be unearthed but a conversation—a fluid exchange between our inner landscapes and the world outside. In this view, the self breathes. It expands, contracts, and reshapes in tandem with the people we meet, the environments we explore, and the connections we foster.

If we look at the journey of self-discovery, perhaps it’s less a straight path or a lofty climb than it is a kind of dance—a rhythm of back-and-forth. It’s a living process, a give and take between the worlds within and the worlds we encounter. Picture walking through a forest or wandering the streets of a city you’ve never been to. There’s a kind of communion that happens if we allow it. The landscape around us stirs something inside—a feeling, a memory, a sense of perspective that hadn’t been there before. The place reaches in as much as we reach out, reminding us that selfhood is never merely introspective; it’s woven through with the sights, sounds, and sensations of the outer world.

This idea of the self as a “living relationship” also speaks deeply to how we experience other people. Each person we connect with—whether they’re a close friend or a fleeting acquaintance—offers us a new vantage point on who we are. They become mirrors, showing us facets we might have overlooked or forgotten. In each interaction lies the potential for self-expansion, a subtle reshaping. To truly engage with another person is to allow their presence to change us, to add to the mosaic of our self-understanding. When we let ourselves be open to this, we come closer to the fullness of self that’s woven through, not carved out of, the world.

And nature itself—the ultimate reminder that we are part of a vast, interconnected ecosystem. This relationship with the natural world, perhaps the most primal of all, holds a wisdom that often lies quietly beneath our awareness. Nature’s cycles, its ebbs and flows, resonate with the deeper rhythms of our own lives. The changing seasons, the migrations, the moon’s pull on the tides—all speak to a timeless rhythm that, when we allow ourselves to tune in, reminds us that we are not separate from these patterns but are participants in them. To feel a connection with nature is to remember that our “deeper self” exists as much in the gentle rustle of leaves or the rush of water over stones as it does within our own bodies.

There’s a profound humility in understanding the self as an active participant in this web of connections rather than a solitary monologue. We let go of the idea that self-discovery is a destination, an end goal where we finally rest, complete and whole. Instead, we find beauty in the recognition that we are always becoming—fluid, responsive, and open to being shaped by what surrounds us. Whether it’s the familiar streets we walk each day, the landscapes of new places, or the people we encounter, each offers us an invitation to rediscover ourselves.

Living in this rhythm requires a kind of awareness—a mindful openness to the present, a willingness to engage in each moment as an opportunity to let the world in, and to let the self out. This exchange is how we learn to harmonize with the world around us, how we discover that self-understanding is less about finality and more about presence.

In this way, each day becomes a chance for renewal. We’re given a fresh opportunity to meet the world anew, to see ourselves reflected in our surroundings, and to let those surroundings reintroduce us to our evolving self. So perhaps the deeper self is, in the end, not an achievement but a relationship—a continuous unfolding, a breathing in and out that binds us intimately with the world. It’s a journey that, like breath itself, is both timeless and ever-flowing, never truly beginning and never truly ending.